Oh my goodness! One month back from getting married and it turns
out we are having a baby! Yep- the Murphy's are having a baby! When we found
out I had a million thoughts run through my mind all at once. The first thing
Austin said was "wait, we haven't even combined our insurance yet!."
Yep. Husband. Super Logical.
My thoughts ranged from "Oh my gosh is this real?!" to
"I can't believe that SO many people have done this before me...it feels
SO huge...and life changing...and crazy!". We have known for about 2 weeks
and things are finally settling in. We are doing a GREAT job of
"sharing" wine at parties (aka Austin is drinking for two if needed),
and I'm doing an even better job sleeping my face off! Who ever thought growing
a baby could be SO tiring!
The mom guilt has already set it. I've felt guilty about not
drinking enough water, eating non-organic food and most recently running a 10K
with no training...I can already picture that little one..."hey mom, how
about you drink more than a cup of coffee before 11 a.m.? or how about drinking
more water when you wake me up at 6:45 a.m. for a 6 mile run?" Fair
enough...guilt city. Sounds like I'm set up for a life time of this.
With all of the crazy emotions going on, gratefulness is a
HUGE front-runner in the emotion train. We are SO lucky to get pregnant so
quickly, we are SO lucky to have loving family and friends that are going to
support this crazy journey and I am SO lucky I married Austin- the most patient
man on earth. I already find my hand resting on my belly protectively and two
things are very clear....we are going to be fine and at the end of this, I'm
going to hold the sweetest little bundle in my arms and commit to a lifetime to
being Present- not Perfect.
And no matter what....I'm taking off my list of guilt of how
often or how well I update this blog!